Having a hard time sleeping...my dad called me today to tell me that he bore his testimony in church. He has always been really great about stuff like that. If I ever give a talk in church and don't tell him he requests a copy. Then promptly reads it to anyone who will listen.
Anywho after he told me what he said I asked him if he would write it down for me. Of course, he already had. Then he paused and said...I think I'm going to have it read at my funeral.
Sadly, this type of conversation has been the norm lately. You see, we found out in July that he has stage 4 prostate cancer. Meaning it has already moved to his bones. His hips first and more recently his spine and skull.
The dr said 2 years. That was before it spread from his hips.
He is doing radiation. But he's decided not to do the aggressive chemo treatments. As he said in his testimony today he has accomplished everything that he ever wanted to in his life. He was married and sealed to my mom. And he got to raise me.
About 20 years ago, just before my mom died, they had a conversation about this. My dad said back then that if the Lord were to take him then his only complaint would be that he didn't get to raise me.
He said to me today "this is one of the reasons why I know the gospel is true and that the Lord loves me. He has always kept all of His promises to me."
Of course I hate even thinking about any of this. Of what he is really saying. Of what is going to happen. But although I want to be mad...I can't. I mean yes, I am sad. Heartbroken really. But not angry. Because thankfully I was raised by this amazing man who taught me what he believes. And he lived it. Everyday. The older I get the more amazed I am by him. I mean this man married a divorced mom with 4 teenagers. He was 38 when he found her. Then after only 10 years his sweetheart died. Leaving him to raise their only child together, alone.
And I have never seen him be depressed or angry about it. He has taken everything in stride. That's how he is.
And this is exactly how I know that my Heavenly Father loves me...I mean of course having two loving parents on earth would have been ideal...but I think it goes without saying that I wouldn't be who I am today if it weren't for going through the trial of losing my mom at such a young age. So I know God loves me because wow, I couldn't have asked for a better dad.
17 comments:
Oh, Liz, I'm all choked up. I had no idea. I'm sorry your dad, you, your family are going through all of that. You're dad is the sweetest and he did a great job with you as well! Thanks for sharing something so tender.
Uh, don't know who "The Turner Family" is? that last comment was me, Crystelle. Someone didn't log out of their google account.
Liz! The tears! Oh man. I didn't know about the spine and skull. Sheesh, i'm glad you aren't angry because I am. It isn't fair.
Oh my goodness Liz!!! I had no idea any of this was happening!! But, you are a strong, amazing woman. And you have been given challenges not many are asked to pass through. And you too have taken them in stride. Much love you and your dad. I couldn't help but think about when he would drive us around the neighborhood with the sun roof open.....and us singing and acting like idiots. He's a great man!!
You are amazing Liz. Amazing. If you ever need anything please call me. Or text. Or IM. Or conference call me through the VOIT phone that unfortunately now is working. :). I'm so sorry about the progression of your dads cancer. He is lucky to have you and you him! Love you girl.
I am so so sorry Liz, what amazing faith you have, you are such a wonderful example to me! I will always remember your sweet dad helping me with all of my violin needs from when I was just a little girl and always looking forward to going in to the music store knowing that he would send me away with something new and exciting- whether it was new music, a fresh thing of rosin, a tuner, or beautiful sounding metronome. He was always so sweet and kind, my prayers are with your family!
I love you.
Sweet sweet Richard. You two have always had the cutest relationship. You are so strong Liz. Hang in there and give Richie my love!
wah. i gots a big ol' lump in my throat. wish i could give you a big squeeze right now. whatever you need liz, i am here for you. xoxo
Liz, you little lover. Thanks for sharing that sweet post with us. Sending prayers your way.
Oh Liz, I am sitting here sobbing! You really do have an amazing dad. I cannot even imagine how proud your mom must be and how thankful she is to him for the daughter that he raised all by himself! I'm sure when she died she knew with all her heart you were in good hands because she married such a wonderful man. So sad to think that he may not be here on earth much longer but so happy to know where he is going! Such a beautiful post....my favorite yet! Love you!
Oh my gosh, Liz. My eyes are full of tears. I just have no words. Hang in there, you sweet girl. Love you.
Also, Crystelle's comment and Turner Family confusion made me laugh through tears. *My favorite emotion*
Love you Liz!!
Liz, that was a very sweet post. I didn't know that your dad had cancer. I am so sorry. You have the attitude of a champion and I am so impressed and inspired by you. What an amazing person you are and what a superdad you have. My prayers are with you and your family. Love you!!!
Liz, that is so sweet. Your dad sounds like an amazing man. I hope you can create many more sweet memories with him!
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